Previously on Bearsuit in Europe: The band is relaxing on the beach in Hossegar. Little do they know what mega emotions lie ahead of them.
[Aside - Charlene explains the origins of the new Bearsuit side project rap anthem: "Check My Job Out":
As I got it off...with my back to Mouse and Lorien (CRUMBS! Ed.), I turned my torso round (apparently in some kind of R&B sexy lady video stylee) and asked Mouse and Lorien if it was all off. Lorien said CHECK HER JOB OUT! And started tapping his bum bum. Then it became "check her job out in the parking lot" etc etc. There was a moment when I kept asking Mouse...it is off! Is it off! And all he said was, yes, it's nice! yes, it's nice! I'm so naive!". Yes Charlene, yes you are. But that's how stars are made.
Anyway back to the action. We rolled into Bordeaux mid-afternoon, still soggy and salty from our beach adventures. Somehow we've always had the best luck when it comes to staying with strangers. But as usual we expect our Bordeaux host to look like Hannibal Lector and live in house made of skin and bones. Thankfully their names were Eric and Cecile and they were really lovely and didn't eat us or anything.
Eric seems to have commandeered us an awesome selection of apartments and a courtyard, including a strange statue with a ginger beard. At last, I am a deity.
Eric and Cecile took us out for dinner that night in town, and we sat outside and dined on camembert the size of our faces and wine that tasted like it had been freshly squozen. Look here's Eric, Rogue and Me. Rogue is only allowed Ribena and a basket of old bread because he's crew.
Afterwards we had a gentle 6 hour stroll around town, with Eric and and Cecile giving us an incredible overview of the architecture, history and changes the town is going through. Thanks guys!
All lovely and civilised but Lorien was hard at work mastering the lyrics to his new rap masterpiece. "Check out my CV if you need a reference. Big jobs are my only preference. Think I'm gonna have a mega emotion. Something something something commotion". Good work Lozzer.
Eric has lots of guests coming and going because he offers "couch surfing" to travellers. Schwing! This led us to meet the delightful Letty, a beautiful petite and.... how can I put this delicately.... completely bat shit crazy Bordeaux girl. In the best possible way... We've met some interesting characters over the years, but Letty had us all in tears within minutes. She makes wild hand gestures when she talks, she's loud, she says exactly what's on her mind and has a sexy delicate croaky voice halfway between Penelope Cruz and Marlene Dietrich. Seconds after realising we were English she let slip a tirade "I fucking love England, Manchester, The Fall, Joy Division". Everything else that annoyed her in the world was "FUCKING BULLLLLCRAP", a phrase we have now commandeered. Mouse is deeply in love within seconds and has rushed upstairs to change into a smoking jacket, pipe and slippers. I'm just about ready for sleepy time, then Jan comes downstairs with a bottle of Janquilla. Uh oh! We did eventually retire for the night for mega cheese nightmares.
[She's also a solo artist who goes under the name 'A Tiny Concept'. Look her up! Somehow I doubt that's the last we'll see of Letty from Bordeaux.]
The gig the next night in Bordeaux was fucking brilliant, such a good crowd. A packed little basement not dissimilar to Take5 in Naarch, but very smoky and scummy like all good venues should be. We played our hearts out, and literally sung our lungs out… hot hot hot but very worth it. Eric and Cecile were bopping at the front and we nearly all had mega emotions. Letty said we were “FUCKING BRILLLLIANT like The Fall, Joy Division. Not like that other BULLCRAP”. Crumbs.
Tomorrow is Paris.
